They Call me Mr. Tater, I'm the T-O-T, one look at me you're filled with ecstasy, like an aphrodisiac I'm the last temptation, read about me in the novel called the fast food nation, but - if you don't like to read, baby I'll plant a seed, h20 to make it grow, but before I proceed, got a story to tell, hell I might as well, share with you, what I do, GEE THAT'LL BE SWELL (nasal voice), Well ever since I was young, it must've been fate, to share my love of taters, with those who hate I don't rial the crowd now, I instigate, I cause a scandal with my handle call me watergate and I can not tell a lie, and I won't deceive, I true to the fry and make you believe, that I'm a fresh-cut Tater, a fry-beat creator, you can't argue with this, cause I'm a MASTER DEBATER, so go ahead and step, but I guarantee man, you'll regret every second I got the mic in my hand, cause I'm the mother-fucking T-O-T-S, the Famine is Ovah, you ain't ready for this! They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, put the mic in my hand you know it's gonna be HOT! They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, said put the mic in my hand you know it's gonna be HOT! They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, They call me Mr. Tater, I'm the T-O-T and everybody in the fryer know who I be... 1 to the 2, 2,3 to the 4 ticka-tots on the mic so I know you want more!, more is what you get, consider this the buffet (pronounced Buff -IT!) but I ain't no smorgasbord and I'm sure you'll get, your money's worth, been doing this since birth, and my name ain't Garth, but I'm rolling in the Mirth-MOBiLllleee, limo-style cause I got no shame, like in Wayn'es World 2, with Heather-by-thy name, yo Taters yo crazy I know this man - they call me the ToT, I'm my own best fan... They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, put the mic in my hand you know it's gonna be HOT! They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, said put the mic in my hand you know it's gonna be HOT! It's gonnat Hot!, It's gonna be It's gonna BE It's gonna be Hot, They call me Mr. Tater, I'm the T-O-T and everybody in the fryer know who I be... Who I be, who I is, I do it for the kids, there's only one Mcee that can Rhyme like this! Been up on the mic since 1983, every-since I was a lowercase t, but now I'm a big T so crispy on the mic, I got the flow I know you all like, I don't pass the mic around like a hot-patatah, pass by the competition, see you tater-haters later, probably at another show, starring who else, huh you-know.... They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, put the mic in my hand you know it's gonna be HOT! They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, said put the mic in my hand you know it's gonna be HOT! They call me the ToT, They Call me the Tot, They call me Mr. Tater, I'm the T-O-T and everybody in the fryer know who I be... Sizzzle, SSSSSSSSsssssizzzlleee...

Time for a day in the life of a ToT, wake up in the morn', watch some porn, channel 69 you can pay-per-view, but I pirate my cable cause, I don't want 2, pay for a favor, whether sexual or not and even if it thickens man, I control the plot, so back to my day, I'm on display like a shelf and ohh by the way, I'm touching myself, I know what you're thinkin', normally you'd be right, but my hands are on my forehead, I was drinkin' all night, So I look around the room and begin to realize, that I'm butt-naked & covered in fries!, but I don't feel dirty, cause I don't have shame, there's a girl on the floor, can't remember her name? I struggle to my feet and head for the shitter, cause I need relief like I was pinch hitter, on the plate man...It stings when I pee, Oh great man...I got an STD, what the hell was I thinkin' & more inportantly, what the hell was I drinking man I need that recipe, I Know you jealous of the rhymes & the funds I RAKE!, In it's a sin for heaven's SAKE! To live the way I do with no tax BREAK! Wrapped in foil, fried in oil, man I feel Twice Baked! TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, Wrapped in foil, fried in oil, man I feel Twice Baked! My roots be in cahoots, underground with the soil, turn the heat-up on the mic, cause you know I 'bout to boil, I shine on stage like I'm wrapped in foil, I put some hop in your step I make yah pop like a coil! My rhymes they last longer, My lyrics nevah spoil, If you suckas try to dis, fry you up with some oil, my crown it's inherited, my blood line is royal, put the mic in my hand, cause my fans they so loyal, they know I work hard, some say I toil, over heat beats simmer and my lyrics start to boil.... like SSSSSSssssssssss Every day I feel alive, When I awake, you be the potato, baby I'll be the steak, there's a party in the oven I think you should partake, wrapped in foil, fried in oil, man I feel TWICE BAKED TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, Wrapped in foil, fried in oil, man I feel Twice Baked! Fries can fried, or fries can be fake, filled with freedom or with lies, twice fried or Twice Baked! TWICE BAKED! Salt potaydahs they marchin', Golden Arches causin' starches to forget where they came from, Ronny's Dustin' 'em with crack, but it ain't the fries fault, that you the one whose so dumb!, You always come back to get your fix, you're afflicted by the tricks of the food that's fast, you're addicted to the kicks you get each time, they charge you ninety-nine, cents it don't make!? A but you still drive-through and you feel Twice Baked! TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, TWICE BAKED!, oh man I feel Twice Baked, Wrapped in foil, fried in oil, man I feel Twice Baked!

You know I am able when it comes to the table to eat everything on the plate that's a potato! FRY IT! People laugh at me, I say what's up with that, but I don't take it heart I just give the shit back, cause I ain't got no reason to tell you lies, CRISPY ON THE MIC, I kick it for the Homefries, When I'm on stage I rage against the machine and I get more ass than Charlie Sheen or even his poppa from Apocalypse, Now listen to me and read my lips! I be like Elephant Juice, you say I Love You back, now we about to get loose I'll make you arch your back, I hear you laughing I don't see what's funny, cause you paid for the show I already spent your money, on the ice that be hanging form the chain, the neck that be bangin' let me explain, my vernacular, If you don't understand, T-O-T on the mic and you know I'm the man... So Crispy on the mic, He be doing this every night, You know it comes as no surprise, CRISPY ON THE MIC, I kick it for the Homefries... Crispy on the mic, I'll never be tame, you just a punk bitch and you lame, but as for me you cannot say the same, Cause I am the one who has got more game, with looks like this, How can you blame, my fans for yelling out my name ToTs! They made me who I am, They made me so famous, but your head and your brain they be filled with lamenous, pass me the mic and I will take this to a place we can kick and you know I kick it hard, I kick so hard I need a new shin guard... So Crispy on the mic, He be doing this every night, You know it comes as no surprise, CRISPY ON THE MIC, I kick it for the Homefries...

Yo...JC on the instruments, ToTs on the mic, you know what to do, Don't forget about M. Bear Pig, 4,3,2,1...1,2,3, ToTs! When I'm on the mic, I am so nice, you see me in the marketplace and I entice, you to slow down or even stop and stare, but you're not on my list! Baby I don't care, you've been pushing that cart, around for awhile, tryin' 2 avoid me girl in the frozen foods isle, I don't who you're kiddin', I don't know who you're playin', so quit pretending that I don't what I'm sayin' CRISPY & CRUNCHY YOU CAN FIND ME IN A BAG! GOLDEN BROWN WITH A NEON TAG, $3.99 IT'S SUCH A DEAL, I MAY LOOK LIKE A SIDE, BUT YOU CAN TRUST I'M A MEAL! Now let's be for real on the mic, I'm viscous, Potatoes I peel and rhymes are delicious, Court is in Session you can be my eye-witness, You see me on stage and you want to get WITH this! Huh!....Yeah!....Huh!... ToTs! back to play scene one act two, Let me set the stage and I'll tell you what to do, let me be direct or should I say bold, I've been chillin' in this freezer too long and it's cold, so baby listen up I'll make you a deal, I'm not a thief but you're heart I'll steal, and soon enough I will appeal, to your mind you may find, that I'm the real deal YOU KNOW I'M!... CRISPY & CRUNCHY YOU CAN FIND ME IN A BAG! GOLDEN BROWN WITH A NEON TAG, $3.99 IT'S SUCH A DEAL, I MAY LOOK LIKE A SIDE, BUT YOU CAN TRUST I'M A MEAL! Huh!....Yeah!....Huh!... ToTs! Go ahead and pretend or even deny, but when you see me B, you know I'm Super-Fry, It's probably because I am so crispy, put you suckers in a fryer if you try and dis me... (Breakdown) Suckas try an dis me, You Suckas try and dis me? bhhh Are you for real? A live wire couldn't stop me Sucka! .... You suckers try to dis me and that shit is whack! I was fried resurrected and now I'm back! better than before I feel complete, biddies knocking on my door they all trying to compete, for my attention, did I mention, that Taters I adore and ToTs you'll never EAT, BEAT, EAT etc... ....

eat another tater baby maybe later...

Listen to the lyrics and decide for yourself... one of my favorite lines ever: "By the end of the night were the words I said, when the sun starts to set you'll be in my bed..."